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Valley News and Views
Drayton , North Dakota
December 19, 2013     Valley News and Views
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December 19, 2013

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Page 4 December 19th 2013 Valley News and Views Dear Lady Di, Ten years ago I discovered a condom in my husband's jacket pocket. was having an affair at work. awhile. This cycle went on for years. I went to counseling to explain both sides I assumed he of the issue, since he made me feel like it was I confronted my fault. Two years ago I discovered I had genital herpes and my husband moved into the guest bedroom. I assumed he was having sex (again) with prostitutes even though he assured me he wasn't. I wanted to believe him, but never really trusted him after the first time. I should have left or made him leave, but felt powerless. Three months later I looked up him and he admitted to having sex with prostitutes. He was devastated that he hurt me and thought I would never find out. I tried to understand it from his point of view. We didn't have sex often, mostly because he was unaffectionate, bossy and critical. Just when I'd had enough and threatened to leave, he'd soften and things would settle down for GREAT BEGINNINGS 1390 (Sound of a siren) Announcer: "Texaco is on the air. Texaco service stations and dealers from coast to coast present the new Jumbo Fire Chief program. We are broadcasting from the Sawdust Ring of the New York Hippodrome, scene of the most spectacular show of all time, an actual audience of 4500 people is. present and we have asked them not to laugh or applaud so that you may better enjoy the program. The story is written by Ben Hecht and Charles MacArthur, with original songs by Richartl Rodgers and Lorenz Hart. All under the personal supervision of Billy Rose." Ca typical beginning for "Jumbo," a musical comedy program on radio; NBC, October 29, 1935, to April 21, 1936) NATIONAL DEBT As of December 15 the national debt was $17,233,392,515,331.48 (over seventeen trillion dollars). On December 8 it was $17,236,000,779,252.24, so it decreased by over two billion 600 million dollars. Each American now owes $ 54,321.53, down $16.07 from the $54,338.00 of December 8. The increase in the national debt since our members of Congress were first in office: Former Senator Kent Conrad: 1987- $2,350,276,890,953.00; Jan. 2, 2013-- $16,44!,433,358,986.17, an increase of over 14 trillion, 91 billion dollars. Former Representative Rick Berg: Jan. 2011--$13,997,932,781,828.89; Jan. 2, 2013-- $16,441,433,358,986.17, an increase of over two trillion 416 billion dollars. Senator John Hoeven: Jan. 2011- -$13,997,932,781,828.89; today-- $17,233,392,515,331.48, an increase of over three trillion 235 billion dollars. Senator Heidi Heitkamp and Representative Kevin Cramer: Jan. 3, 2013--$16,437,549,999,170.77; today-- S17,233,392,515,331.48, an increase of $795 billion. AN EYE ON OBAMACARE Estimated Qualified Health Plan (QHP) enrollment (8 DEC 13), 381,719 North Dakota QHP enrollment (30 NOV 13), 265 (source: TRIVIA QUIZ TIME 818 1. are the fastest land animals. (a. cheetahs; b. ostriches; c. ponghorns) 2. A Black-eyed Susan is a. Ca. flower; b. painting; c. tree) 3. A whippet is a/an. Ca. ape; b. dog; c. snake) 4. __ live in warrens. (a. ferrets; b. mice; c. rabbits) 5. __ are kept in runs. Ca. dogs; b. horses; c. sheep) (answers at the end of the Column) A MESS OF POTTAGE 1447 This portion of my column describes the works of Libertarian philosopher and economist Murray Rothbard (1926-1995). In 1995 he published "Economic Thought Before Adam Smith." Chapter 11 is entitled "Mercantilism and freedom in England from the Civil War to 1750." Over the centuries some historians, especially those of a Marxist bent, have claimed that John Locke was a founder of the LaborTheoryofValuewhichsays that thevalue of a product is determined by the amount of labor that goes into the production of that item. Rothbard shows that is a mistaken idea: Locke's theory is a labor theory of property; it deals with how previously unowned property comes under the ownership of the person who uses his or her labor to materially change it into something with more utility. Marx's labor theory deals with the value of products or services on a market and how it is determined. POETIC FRAGMENTS Percy Bysshe Shelley C1792-1822) was a major Romantic poet. Here is a portion of his poem "Ode To The West Wind": "Thou who didst waken from his summer-dreams The blue Mediterranean, where he lay Lulled by the coil of his crystalline streams, Beside a pumice isle in Baiae's bay, And saw in sleep old palaces and towers Quivering within the wave's intenser day, All overgrown with azure moss and flowers So sweet, the sense faints picturing them!" DHS, 1927 50 The Pembina County Track Meet and the County Declamation Contest were postponed from May 13-14 to May 27-28, and then cancelled altogether due to bad weather. BILLBOARD'S TOP TEN 1973 December 15 1. The Most Beautiful Girl (Charlie Rich) 2. Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (Elton John) 3. Top Of The World (Carpenters) 4. JustYou 'N' Me (Chicago) 5. Time In A Bottle (Jim Croce)* 6. Hello, It's Me (Todd Rundgren) 7. Leave Me Alone (Helen Reddy) 8. Photograph (Ringo Starr) 9. The Joker (Steve Miller Band)* 10. If You're Ready (Staple Singers)* (* indicates a new song) Jim Croce was born January 10, 1943, in Philadelphia. He died in a plane crash near Natchitoches, LA, on September 20, 1973. From 1972 to 1976 he had eleven hit songs, ten of which made the Hot 100. "Time In A Bottle" was his sixth release. It peaked at #1, was on the charts for fifteen weeks, and became his second-biggest all -time hit behind "Bad, Bad Leroy Brown." NUMBER 1 SONGS DECEMBER 19 1893--The Fatal Wedding (George J. Gaskin) 1898--My Old New Hampshire Home (George J. Gaskin) 1903--Any Rags? (Arthur Collins) 1908--Sunbonnet Sue (Harry MacDonough/Haydn Quartet) 1913--Peg O' My Heart (Charles Harrison) 1918--I'm Always Chasing Rainbows (Charles Harrison) 1923--That 'Old Gang Of Mine (Billy Murray/Ed Smalle) 1928--Sonny Boy CAt Jolson) 1933--Did You Ever See A Dream Walking? (Eddy Duchin) 1938--Two Sleepy People (Fats Waller) 1943--Pistol Packin' Mama (A1 Dexter); Paper Doll (Mills Brothers) 1948--Buttons And Bows (Dinah Shore) 1953--Rags To Riches (Tony Bennett) 1958--To Know Him, Is To Love Him (Teddy Bears) 1963--Dominique (Singing Nun) 1968--I Heard It Through The Grapevine (Marvin Gaye) 1973--The Most Beautiful Girl (Charlie Rich) 1978--You Don't Bring Me Flowers (Barbra Streisand/Neil Diamond) 1983--Say Say Say (Paul McCartney/ Michael Jackson) 1988--Look Away (Chicago) 1993--Again (Janet Jackson) 1998--I'm Your Angel (R. Kelly/Celine Dion) 2003--HeyYa! (OutKast) 2008--Single Ladies (Beyonce) 15 YEARS AGO On December 19, 1998, at the Lakota Tournament the DHS volleyball team defeated NewRockford 15-6 and 15-9; Dakota Prairie 15-7, 15-5; and the Devils Lake jv 15- 10,3-15. NOTABLE QUOTES Mistress Quickly: "Marry, this is the short and the long of it." (from Shakespeare's comedy "MerryWives of Windsor," Act II. sc. 2) Trivia Quiz Answers (1.a; 2. a; 3.b; 4. c; 5. a) Valiey News and ews  P Box 309:  Dra'on; N.O. 58225 sex addiction on the Internet. After reading several articles I felt this was my husband's problem. I told my husband if he admitted this was his problem, I would stand by him. He told me about 15 years of sex addiction, that is, sex with men in parks and public places. This has been a nightmare. He's seeing atherapist andwe began couples counseling. We've made a tremendous effort to work through our issues and have become much closer and intimate again. I'm not sure if I can ever get over feeling betrayed. I have a great job, adult children and good friends, but still feel like I'm in limbo. Our couples' therapist says we're both still healing. I would like to hear your opinion since it's hard to discuss this with my friends in my small town. Anonymous Dear Anonymous, What your psychologist calls healing sounds more like getting used to something distasteful. As a bride, you didn't dream your husband would be meeting men in public for sex. That's like trying to get used to living in a prison; forget about the outside world, you're here for life! When we don't live our authentic self, our true desires break through. Your desire was for an honest, faithful, loving husband. His desire is to be who he really is, when no one's going to find out. When you prompted your husband to admit an addiction, you trapped yourself. Do you feel if he has an illness, you're a bad person ffyou want to leave him? To go to counseling with your husband is sabotaging what you need to do. There's no time like the preent to show him the door. Lady Di Write Lady Di confidentially at "If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together... there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even when we're apart...I'll always be with you." - Winnie the Pooh It has definitely been an emotional holiday season. On Monday we attended funeral services for Sharon Ososki who was battling cancer for some time and most recently was stricken with pneumonia. She passed away at Altru Hospital on Thursday, Dec. 12. We grew up with Sharon's family. Her two oldest daughters Andrea and Michelle graduated from high school with my brother Mike, her oldest son Dale graduated with me, and her youngest son Tim was a few years older than my younger brother. They lived in the country not too far from our childhood home. My entire family was so very sad to hear of her passing. Sharon was a spitfire. As one gentleman said at her funeral, "She was tough on the outside but a big softy on the inside." There is no doubt Sharon-had a big heart and was always trying to help someone in need. In recent years there were many times I would visit with her about her cancer diagnosis and subsequent treatments but she rarely wanted to talk about herself. She was more interested in how my brother Mike was doing. One of the last times I spoke with her she told me to let her know if there was anything they could do and said with courageous positivity, "He is an inspiration, I am praying for him every day." What she didn't realize is she was an inspiration too. One of the things I loved most about Sharon was I never had to worry about walking on egg shells so to speak around her. Sharon would tell you what she thought and I constantly admired that about her. I will never forget the words of encouragement and empathy she dished out whenever I saw her. She was a good soul and I have no doubt she is spreading her bold, charismatic spirit in heaven. As her husband Richard said to me when I gave him a hug and expressed my condolences, "Don't be sorry, she is happy now." Inside her funeral booklet were these words, ' thousand times we needed you, a thousand times we cried; if love alone could have saved you, You never would have died. As a heart of gold stopped beating, Two twinkling eyes closed to rest; You are an angel in heaven, For God only takes the best." It was so fitting for this woman who certainly lived her life with a heart of gold and a twinkle in her eyes. She was a tough lady and fought cancer with undeniable strength. I know she will be missed by many who found beyond her tough exterior, a caring, compassionate soul. As we sat in the beautiful St. Edward's Catholic Church, my husband and I noticed the ethereal stained glass pictures of Saints architecturally placed high at the front of the church. Throughout the entire service, the bright sunlight flowed through every one of those windows except the image of Jesus. As those around me sang the poignant words to one of my favorite songs, "Here I am, Lord" with tears in my eyes I looked up to the face of Jesus surrounded by those glowing Saints. I thought about Sharon and how like so many others in recent years; once again in our grief and confusion, for some reason God had to take another one of the good ones on this earth. Listening to the congregation sing that song, tears flowed down my cheeks. "I, the Lord of snow and rain, I have born my peoples pain. I have wept for love of them, they turn away. I will break their hearts of stone, give them hearts for love alone. I will speak My word to them, Whom shall I send? Here I am Lord, is it I Lord? I have heard you calling in the night. I will go Lord, if You lead me. I will hold Your people in my heart." The words spoke to my heart that day with such consuming clarity. For Sharon, it was her time to go and I think she knew that. She probably heard the Lord calling her in the night when illness was taking over her physical body. I too have heard Him calling - gently nudging me to go, hold those struggling with illness and grief, with sadness and desperation in my heart, to aid with a compassionate, accepting temperament. I know there are many who hear His call as well because I have personally experienced the grace of His energy flowing through the kindness of others like the secret angel who left my husband and I a gift certificate at our local grocery store last week. That one simple gesture brought hope in the midst of a difficult day. Sometimes along the way we are trampled with the darkness of grief and fear. We are left feeling confused and unsettled, sweltering from circumstances we cannot change and don't understand. Fear wraps its saturating manifestations around our hearts and we lose sight of the angelic grace within the people and experiences of this panoramic journey. I know without a doubt my papa was probably standing there ready to give Sharon a hug when she arrived at heaven's gates. I comprehend the mark she made on this earth even though I don't think she ever realized she did. Most of us have no clue while we are here the impact our lives have on those around us. In our living room hangs a picture of Papa's smiling face as he sits at my younger brother's wedding reception in his tuxedo. It was given to me by my sister-in-law Kari Jo and there isn't a day that goes by where I don't look at it and read the words written at the bottom, "If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together...there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart... I'll always be with you." In my moments of weakness those words have been a comforting catalyst to the raptures of grief. My thoughts and prayers go out to Sharon's family and to all those struggling with loss this holiday season. May we never turn away from people in need, always have intent for love alone, hear His call to go, reach out with compassionate arms, and forever hold His people in our hearts. Rest in Peace Sharon -We will miss your heart of gold. GREETINGS,' FRIENDS & MERRY CHRISTMAS! Kilmer Construction Grafton 352-3357 Mobile 520-0109 THE SKI & BIKE SHOP Corner of 17 t & Washington - Grand Forks Next to Blockbuster 772-5567 i][ ..... r ..... i Iiii